A thread in which I shall insult you, your taste, and your car.

Grandpawmoses · Sep 14, 2024

Why won’t the skeleton fart in public? He doesn’t have the guts.
Two flies are sitting on a piece of poop and one fly farts. The other fly says "Hey!, I'm trying to eat here."

JakeTheSnak3 · Sep 14, 2024

Jennyjo14 said: ↑

Eww. There's nothing worse than a fart that's so bad, you can taste it.

https://youtu.be/lbd3gSkeTVg?si=WOkQWZs0ZvR3vG9L
Click to expand...

Oh GOD! LOLOLOLOL

BLKNBLU · Sep 14, 2024

MI-FL off roader said: ↑

Just remember, every time you look at google maps or watch a live sporting event, part of that tech was launched from Brevard County FLA. Oh and the only perfect NFL season, still resides in Miami. And where would we all be without a good "Florida Man" joke once a day.
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Great point. It would probably be good to also remember that a lot of that tech got launched with a big assist from Huntsville Alabama where they only read 2 pages a day.

From my Alabama friend:
An Alabama state trooper stops a fellow for speeding.
Trooper - Have you got any ID?
Driver - 'Bout whut?

mainerunr · Sep 16, 2024

Captain Spalding[OP] initial post: ↑

I have vowed never to buy another car that is black, white, red, or any flavor of gray. Look at the sheer number of them! I just don’t want to contribute to the monotony I see on the road.

What your choice of car color says about you:

Midnight Black Metallic, Attitude Black Metallic, Black
You see yourself as “cool”. You probably wear sunglasses at night and have an allergy to chrome. You like gangster movies and bob your head to theme music in your head as you drive.

Ice Cap, Blizzard, Natural White, Super White, Blizzard Pearl Metallic
These cars are colorless and bland, like the people who drive them. Buy a personality and drive a car with an actual color!

Nautical Blue - Ahoy polloi! See you at the yacht club. Didn’t they used to have an Eddie Bauer edition?

Voodoo Blue - the color of your man parts whilst tied off with a rubber band. Totally cringy.

Cavalry Blue

Lime Rush - A great base color for a Gatorade™ promotional wrap! For folks who are determined to have the “special color”, no matter what it is.

Army Green

Barcelona Red, Salsa Red Pearl
Colors associated with heat, spice and blood. Is it a coincidence that you drive a car this color? In-your-face and RACY. Go do some crimes - or - wiggle into your tightest cocktail dress and PARTY!

Solar Octane, Inferno
“Look at me! Look at me!” For narcissists and attention seekers. These colors are not found in nature. They are unnatural. Like you. Friends don’t let friends drive day-glo.

Terra - what Solar Octane will look like after fading in a junkyard for a decade.

Magnetic Gray Metalic, Classic Silver Metallic, Titanium Silver, Cement, Galactic Mica, Shadow Mica, Lunar Rock, Underground
Look at all these names for gray! Sooo much effort put into making gray sound exciting rather than dull. Not black. Not white. These cars fade into background, much like their owners. Drivers of these cars lack commitment.

You may have noticed that Cavalry Blue and Army Green have avoided criticism. They denote bravery and honor. But most of all they avoid being black, white, gray, and red — and without being obnoxious.
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Meh, my ex-wife, who is a total c*nt drives a cavalry blue tacoma. She has zero honor. Since you were so horribly wrong about that color, I have no choice but to assume that you are wrong about the others as well....

(and like so many others, I did not choose the color, it was the first available color, I chose the vehicle)

JET4 said: ↑

I drive a Salsa Red Pearl and everywhere I go people say they really like that color.
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They are afraid that you are unhinged so they compliment your color choice...

Yotaholic said: ↑

I wanted the Lunar Rock but they were gone before they get to the lot. I had two choices, Black or Nautical Blue, I went Black
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I wanted Lunar Rock too...but I'm actually glad that I didn't get it...

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